Unholy three


We are all made of three.
Body, mind, spirit –
Functioning together, making us whole.
I am comprised of three,
the child, the adult and the dog.
Distinct yet unbalanced,
An explosive combination?

There’s the willful child,
angry, determined, invariably in trouble.
I fear her being seen –
Uncontrollable, Unpredictable, Irrepressible,
Capable of wreaking havoc to the point of death!
Brutally I crush her,
Rarely allowing her voice to be heard.

I have a mature and capable adult,
With an overdeveloped sense of responsibility.
Wise, practical, “an old head on young shoulders”.
She observes, absorbs, holds it all in.
Reasoned, insightful, articulating logical solutions,
Repressing inconvenient feelings.
Showing only warmth and constancy to the unsteady or chaotic.

Now say hello to black dog.
He is the unwelcome presence I cannot shake.
Never far behind, ignored and uninvited.
He carries the sadness and the grief,
The disappointment of needs consistently unmet.
A reminder of the pain still to be faced,
The tears yet to be shed.

So how do these three become one?
Love and nurture the child,
Trust her and let her speak out.
Don’t allow the grown-up to dominate.
The rational, denying and shaming
the intuitive, emotional and creative.
Accept black dog, appreciate the burden he carries for you.

And what of that Mighty Other three in one?
The table I hide under, the wings that cover me,
the arms that hold and contain me?
I’m committed to your healing.
I trust in your knowledge, wisdom and care.
Not with a passive prayer or feeble love song of adoration
But with passion, resolve and strength.

I will find a way to love all three,
Value the depth and diversity they bring:
The empathy I share;
The vulnerability I risk;
The joy I’ll discover.
No unholy trinity after all!
Just an imperfect but wonder full reflection of the Ultimate, Great ‘I Am’.